How to Pick a Mentor
One of the many classes I wish I had in school was how to navigate the social side of my career. It would have been great to have a class that taught me how to get into the right place for new opportunities.
Or how to pick a mentor or career advisor. If you’re like most professionals, you never got this formal training either. You figure it out by working and asking questions. And of course, by making mistakes or following role models that I admire.
3 Ways to Get & Keep a Good Mentor
Here’s what I’ve learned about getting and keeping a good mentor:
1) YOU NEED TO KNOW WHAT YOU WANT OUT TO THE RELATIONSHIP
It’s a waste of everyone’s time if you are waiting for someone more experienced to tell you what to do. What worked for them may not work for you and may not get you what you want.
Get clear on your goals and motivations before each mentoring conversation.
2) PICK A MENTOR THAT YOU ADMIRE FOR THEIR ACCOMPLISHMENTS IN YOUR FIELD
This one sounds obvious, but so many people don’t do this. I’ve seen so many people leaning on a mentor who doesn’t know their industry or unique challenges. It makes it tough to succeed because you are building from scratch.
Be on the lookout for someone that’s accomplished something great in that field that you want to pursue. Someone who is at least a few steps ahead of you and has lessons to share that will help you level up in your career.
My grandmother used to tell me “Never take relationship advice from a single person” and “Never take money advice from a broke person.” No matter how good their intentions, they don’t have the experience to help you succeed faster.
3) LOOK TO CREATE A MUTUALLY BENEFICIAL RELATIONSHIP
In life, the best relationships have a give-and-take dynamic that enriches both people. One-sided relationships don’t last because it becomes a burden to the giver.
Don’t be a burden, be a contributor to your mentor or advisor. If you don’t know how to do that right away, it’s okay. Sometimes it evolves as you work together.
Even if your ideal mentor is significantly older or younger than you, you can contribute to their development.